Gloomy Night

A gloomy night that adds on the pain you are in can really pierce your heart

It has past midnight. Laying in bed with the laptop at the side, trying to tolerate with the agony I am in while waiting for his response. So I am doing my best to be optimistic, as you know that I am a boy under paranoia due to the past experiences I had with those stains (A term for my exes).

I did not realize my expectations were built up so high for this coming Friday Night that a slight chance of being toppled down might be the result at the end of the day. I could not describe how incisive the torment I am going through.

Doing my best by pushing in all the distinct effort to prove how much you mean to me but I just do not want to go overboard for I might lose you again. So wary that I do not want to plunge into the bad sequel. So defying as his schedule now is pretty tight as compared to back then. He is going back to Australia on the 6th of December to celebrate Christmas with his family.

He only has a few days left to be in Singapore yet not a single hour is available for us to meet. I do not even know what to do now but just wait for his return once he is done with his time for his beloved family. But even when he returns, there will be a small amount of time for us to spend.

There is no other way but I have to get used to this. I know I eventually will. I just do not know why he means so much to me. " Love has so much to offer yet it may afflict you along the way ". I really have that fear, of losing you, once again. I am hoping that it will not transpire, that is all. Please, Zairul, do not fail this time round.